After my mom left, I worked up the will power to finish packing; we were moving in four days! Thankfully we'd been doing a little every day, plus I'd done a lot before she came to visit, so I didn't have much to do. I was really struggling with my motivation.
Alex was my good helper one day while the others were playing with the neighbors. Their outdoor play time was my saving grace that week.
I finally took the pictures off of the walls three days before our move. It instantly made the room feel empty and made me feel sad.
Abby was my good helper every day because she was my easiest child.
My stress was mounting all week and moving day arrived before I knew it. This ties with another move in first place for my most stressful move. I should probably explain the factors surrounding that. All of them are temporal and so not what really matters, but nevertheless had (have) to be dealt with. For one thing this move cost us $22,000 between the loss we took on the house, the necessary repairs for closing, and the move itself. That is hard to take. So I was stressed about money and really disappointed. Second, we were leaving a house that I really loved for a significantly smaller and less nice rental, and our rent was 1 1/2 times our mortgage! I was fine with the idea of downsizing, but the cost was really frustrating. Put that on top of our financial loss and I was feeling incredibly discouraged. I wish money didn't play such an important role! Third, I didn't know how we were going to manage the actual move. The only trucks available the day of our move were very small considering how much we needed to load. So we didn't expect to get it all that day. There are a lot of stresses that I think I handle really well, maybe even better than average, but for some reason a moving day is one that has always been incredibly hard for me. I feel like a different person on a moving day and I don't like it. My kids played into the stress as well because we hadn't been on a normal schedule for several weeks and their behavior was showing it.
So moving day arrived and we got going nice and early. It was truly a day of blessings. I was nervous about how things were going to go. At 8am our wonderful helpers arrived, and we had way more help than expected! They had both moving trucks loaded in no time, but it quickly became apparent that we barely had half of our stuff on those trucks. I was still stressing big time and in tears. The tears were because I didn't want to ask anyone to help us with a second load, but a second load was absolutely necessary.
Several people said they would return to help us load up a second time, so I dried my tears and started driving the truck. Jim drove the other truck, so I was on my own and very anxious still. I sang the whole way to calm myself down. We arrived earlier than planned to unload, so we were very thankful that some men from our new ward came to help us! The unloading went surprisingly fast and we were on our way back for the other load around noon. We managed to load everything remaining on that second trip and I finally felt I could breathe. We really hadn't expected to move everything that day; we were just hoping to get most of it. We hadn't planned to make two trips either, or for the way the timing worked out. On the receiving end, neither of the times we unloaded were when we'd previously arranged for help, but people came to help both times. A wonderful friend sacrificed her whole day to watch all four kids for us so I could drive the truck back and forth and help with the loading and unloading. It was way longer than I'd anticipated on her end and she was such a good sport about it. I felt very humbled and blessed that so many people sacrificed their time and muscles (and sanity in one case) to assist us. There's nothing like a move to help me feel extra grateful.
As we finished loading the second time it occurred to me that I'd like a picture of the wonderful people who came to assist us. There are even some missing in this picture. I intended to take a picture when we unloaded as well, but I couldn't find my phone to do so. Then I totally forgot when I finally picked up my kids. If anyone who helped us is reading this (or who loaned their husbands to us) I'd like to say thank you again!
Once we had everything moved I had plenty to do and was still an emotional mess. The week before, we had to find a rental house really fast (as in 2 days) and most of the houses we looked at were awful. So I wasn't very sure I liked the place we'd be living. I took pictures at one to show Jim because he wasn't with me, so I have a sample here.
Scary, huh? This is not the house we rented, but was the second best one we looked at.
We ultimately chose our rental because it was the only one we saw that wasn't awful. Once we moved in, though, we discovered that our house was really dirty. To put that on top of everything I already needed to do and then throw my emotional state into it was too much. I went to bed that night in low spirits.
The first part of the week was tough, but something wonderful happened each day to help pull me through. On Sunday church was the wonderful part. I was feeling so discouraged about needing to clean two houses and unpack, and I was missing our old house. Then everyone was so friendly in our new ward. I felt like I was introduced to half the women! It made for a much needed bright spot.
These pictures are from Sunday afternoon. We took a much needed family nap that really helped with my outlook. After we all woke up, we couldn't find Annie anywhere. I was positive she was downstairs somewhere, but it was quite the mystery. This is where we found her.
On Monday my goal was to clean the new house enough that I could start unpacking. I had to run errands in our old city that morning, so by the time I arrived home to start cleaning I was already tired. Plus the task was daunting. Three women from our new ward showed up to help me clean, though. I didn't even get to visit with them while we worked because I was working in a different room, but I was so grateful for their help. They helped with the physical labor of sanitizing my kitchen and bathroom, but what was more important they lifted my spirit. I felt so much better for their loving service. They were Monday's bright spot.
On Tuesday I started unpacking. It wasn't very long before I was buried in boxes and discouraged. I texted these pictures to my mom to share my discouragement.
Around the time I was feeling so discouraged I had a phone call from someone in our new ward. She was calling to welcome me and get my e-mail address; it helped me to know someone was reaching out. Later I reached a point that I knew I needed to stop or I'd be in tears again, so I took a break to sit outside and watch the kids play. They've been having such a great time being able to ride bikes now that we have a driveway where it's possible. I started feeling positive about our new place and enjoyed being outside with them.
That night we cleaned our old house. When we finished I took a long look around and said goodbye. That did wonders for me. I woke up the next morning feeling positive and ready to tackle everything. I don't understand why it was so hard for me to leave that house. I know with my whole heart that I can be happy anywhere. We have been happy in a trailer, a little apartment, living with family, and another rental house. Our new rental is really a decent house, and it has plenty of space for the most part. It's not the physical attributes that make a place home for us. Yet I was in tears for several days over leaving that house.
Even though I was feeling better by Wednesday, the positive 'extras' kept coming. I made some real progress unpacking that day and we met the cutest little old lady that lives across the street from us. I'm seriously so excited that she's our neighbor. That evening another neighbor stopped by to say hello too; this time it was a cute elderly man. I love making new friends!
The kids played outside a lot that day too. At one point I checked on them and found Alex in a precarious position! Those boxes were not very stable. I learned to keep the garage closed after that.
That evening we started enjoying the blessing of Jim's short commute. He only has a five minute drive now and he was done early that day so he could come straight home instead of needing to wait for his carpool. When he arrived home we had a little relaxed time, then dinner, then did some work, and still had time to play outside as a family! It was so wonderful to have a WHOLE evening together!
On Thursday we ran errands so I didn't unpack anything. My little 'extra' that day was a visit from two women in our ward. They came on behalf of the Primary to welcome us.
Here we are starting to feel at home again.
Yesterday I made so much progress on the house that I took the afternoon to give the kids some much needed Mommy time. We played a game and read together.
I also let them play in the boxes while I unpacked. That was loud and crazy!
Then the kids were super excited when Jim came home. I loved how they were visiting with him.
That evening we had a surprise visit from two more women in our new ward. They came on behalf of the Relief Society. That was such a nice end to our day.
Today we organized the garage so I can find the rest of the boxes I need to unpack, and then we had a family nap. I'm feeling so much better now. Our new house is starting to feel like home now and that makes a huge difference. I'm really excited to make new friends here. Best of all, Jim isn't so tired after work and we are getting more time with him. That's what this move was really about and it trumps everything else.
